I wrote last week about how few women cracked my top ten albums of 2001 (few as in one, Lucinda Williams). Is that because I wasn’t as open to female artists back then or was it not a great year for women in music?
Probably more the former than the latter, but I will submit that the most acclaimed release by a woman that year was Björk’s Vespertine, and I’ve heard enough of it to know that it definitely wouldn’t have won me over then, and it sure isn’t going to win me over now either.
Björk recorded this album with the Napster revolution in mind, intentionally using sounds and instruments that would sound good when downloaded. She gathered what she called “micro-beats,” little snippets of vocals and percussion sounds recorded around her home, to weave a sonic tapestry.
That sounds cool but the end result just doesn’t do it for me. It’s dramatic and exotic and the kind of thing music critics go nuts over, but to me it just sounds like annoying background music. Give me ‘Bootylicious’ all day over this.
Through the warmest cord of care
Your love was sent to me
I’m not sure what to do with it
Or where to put it
[Pre-Chorus]
I’m so close to tears
And so close to
Simply calling you up
And simply suggesting
[Chorus]
We go to that hidden place
That we go to that hidden place
We go to that hidden place
We go to the hidden place
[Verse 2]
Now I have been slightly shy
And I can smell a pinch of hope
To almost have allowed one’s fingers
To stroke the fingers I was given to touch with
[Pre-Chorus]
But careful, careful
There lies my passion, hidden
There lies my love
I’ll hide it under a blanket
Lull it to sleep
[Chorus]
I’ll keep it in a hidden place
I’ll keep it in a hidden place
Keep it in a hidden place
Keep it in a hidden place
[Verse 3]
He’s the beautifullest, fragilest
Still strong, dark and divine
And the littleness of his movements
Hides himself
He invents a charm that makes him invisible
Hides in the hair
[Pre-Chorus]
Can I hide there too?
Hide in the hair of him
Seek solace
Sanctuary
[Outro]
In that hidden place
In a hidden place
In a hidden place
We’ll stay in a hidden place
Oh, in a hidden place
We’ll live in a hidden place
We’ll be in a hidden place
In a hidden place
Meet Me In Montauk 
I’ve always considered Bjork to be Exhibit A of musical pretentiousness.