Song of the Day #4,577: ‘After All (Live)’ – Dar Williams

Continuing the chronological presentation of my 25 favorite songs…

After All‘ – Dar Williams (2000)

Eleven years ago, when I first wrote about this song on the blog, I couldn’t find it on YouTube so I had to upload my own version. That clip has received more than 125k views since. Not exactly ‘Gangnam Style,’ but pretty impressive for a rather obscure artist like Dar Williams.

On that clip, and on the other videos that eventually made it to YouTube, you’ll find many comments by listeners that this song quite literally saved their lives. I can only imagine how heartening that must be for Williams.

‘After All’ is about Williams’ battle with depression and contemplation of suicide. It traces her journey to the moment when “life chose [her] after all.”

I find this lyric so powerful, and the melody so lovely, that it moves me deeply even though I’m fortunate enough to not relate to it on a personal level.

Williams has a knack for these simple but profound sentiments. Her ‘When I Was a Boy‘ is another favorite song of mine, one that contended for this list. I posted that one on YouTube as well, where it’s received more than 190k views.

Poses‘ – Rufus Wainwright (2001)

Rufus Wainwright’s sophomore album, Poses, is not my favorite of his, but it is the one that established him as one of my favorite artists. And this title track, in particular, cemented his greatness.

Wainwright wrote this song about the young, hopeful men — himself included — who come to New York City seeking enlightenment but end up disillusioned and in pain. The romantic weariness of his vocals is buoyed by the swelling piano and strings.

‘After All’ and ‘Poses’ are songs that work for me the way some great movies do — by immersing me in an unfamiliar perspective and painting a vivid portrait of another person’s life.

My Love Has Gone‘ – Josh Rouse (2005)

Coming up with a list of favorite songs leads inevitably to another challenge — coming up with a list of favorite albums. I’ll give myself that assignment for the coming months.

Of all the albums represented on this countdown, Josh Rouse’s Nashville is the one I know without a doubt will show up on that albums list. It’s a melancholy masterpiece and I simply adore it.

‘My Love Has Gone’ is the album’s finest moment, a straight-forward heartbreak ballad about the lonely space between the end of one love affair and the start of a new one.

Funny how the chronology and my posting pattern conspired to make today’s featured trio such a bummer. I realize my whole list is rather somber, but this batch was a doozy!

Go ahead, push your luck
Find out how much love the world can hold
Once upon a time I had control
And reined my soul in tight

Well the whole truth
Is like the story of a wave unfurled
But I held the evil of the world
So I stopped the tide
Froze it up from inside

And it felt like a winter machine
That you go through and then
You catch your breath and winter starts again
And everyone else is spring bound

And when I chose to live
There was no joy, it’s just a line I crossed
It wasn’t worth the pain my death would cost
So I was not lost or found

And if I was to sleep
I knew my family had more truth to tell
And so I traveled down a whispering well
To know myself through them

Growing up, my mom had a room full of books
And hid away in there
Her father raging down a spiral stair
Till he found someone
Most days his son

And sometimes I think
My father, too, was a refugee
I know they tried to keep their pain from me
They could not see what it was for

But now I’m sleeping fine
Sometimes the truth is like a second chance
I am the daughter of a great romance
And they are the children of the war

Well the sun rose with so many colors
It nearly broke my heart
And worked me over like a work of art
And I was a part of all that

So go ahead, push your luck
Say what it is you’ve got to say to me
We will push on into that mystery
And it’ll push right back
And there are worse things than that

Cause for every price
And every penance that I could think of
It’s better to have fallen in love
Than never to have fallen at all

Cause when you live in a world
Well it gets in to who you thought you’d be
And now I laugh at how the world changed me
I think life chose me after all

3 thoughts on “Song of the Day #4,577: ‘After All (Live)’ – Dar Williams

  1. Amy says:

    It’s intriguing, though perhaps not that surprising, that our lists have more common ground the further back chronologically you go (or, to be more accurate to the way you have rolled out your list…. less common ground as we enter our current era). Of these three artists, only Williams would be a possibility for my top spots, though, to be honest, I hadn’t considered “When I Was. Boy,” a song I love dearly, until reading your blog this morning.

    Maddie has reached out to friends to compile their lists, and it’s been fascinating to see where our musical tastes overlap with those we hold closest and where they diverge. I, for one, am happy to have a spot freed up by the absence of Rufus 😜 to fill with Petty, Mitchell, Prince, Carly Simon, King or a few other of the artists on my list who did not make yours.

    And, again, no surprise given my comments on this blog over the years, my list leans towards songs from earlier decades. When it came time to cut, I was more likely to keep a song that had made its impression on me early and remained a favorite over the many years since than one I had fallen in love with during the past 10 or so years.

  2. Dana Gallup says:

    All three songs are lovely, none would make my list.

  3. andrea katz says:

    Wonderful discovery, thanks to you:)

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