Song of the Day #1,500: ‘Claire’s Ninth’ – Ben Folds

Pandora tells me I like Ben Folds because his music exhibits major key tonality, melodic songwriting and a dynamic male vocalist. That’s how the musical genome project categorizes his music (along with dozens of other attributes they don’t surface, I’m sure). And according to that criteria, I should also like Josh Ritter, Ben Kweller and Death Cab for Cutie.

I don’t know two of those artists and I’m indifferent to the third but I’m sure they do sound something like Ben Folds and probably have some of the same fans. But does my love of Ben Folds necessarily mean that I’ll like people who sound like him? Maybe I like him despite his major key tonality (whatever that means), not because of it.

Like most people, I have a variety of musical tastes that can’t be summed up in a few carefully selected phrases. No matter how carefully and accurately the genome project dissects Ben Folds, it won’t figure out that I also really dig Eminem. I’d have to create another station to hear his music, and chances are I’d dislike most of what turned up there.

I wondered if I could create my own musical genome that more accurately accounted for my tastes. The idea wouldn’t be to group artists who sound alike but rather to find broader similarities between artists who might not sound alike at all.

I started off by writing down a list of artists who I consider my favorites. I avoided one- or two-record wonders — though I didn’t set a minimum, the list I wound up with doesn’t feature anybody with fewer than four albums. I was selective but not overly so, and wound up with a list of 35 artists.

Then I started grouping them. I discovered pretty quickly that I could do so in a number of different ways, and that some artists fell into multiple categories. Over the next seven weeks, I’m going to post a song by each of those artists and list the categories that apply. I hope to arrive at some grand unified theory of music appreciation, but at the very least I’ll play a lot of good songs.

First, the categories. I was able to assign 28 of my 35 artists to five broad groups, which I’ve labelled ‘PIANO MEN (AND WOMEN),’ ‘PURE POP,’ ‘COUNTRY PLUS,’ ‘FOLK ROCK DERIVATIVES’ and ‘MELANCHOLY.’ The remaining seven didn’t fit easily into any of those groups so I formed a separate ‘ODDBALL’ designation.

So kicking things off in chapter one of this 35-part series (and my 1,500th Song of the Day post) is Mr. Ben Folds.

Folds obviously falls into the ‘PIANO MEN (AND WOMEN)’ primary category, though he has also produced his share of ‘PURE POP’ and the occasional ‘MELANCHOLY’ tune as well. In fact, part of his genius is how he combines all three of those qualities, sometimes in the same song.

I chose ‘Claire’s Ninth,’ from Lonely Avenue (his collaboration with author Nick Hornby), for exactly that reason. It’s a bittersweet sketch of a young girl dealing with her parents’ divorce, and Folds captures the sadness in the verses but also unleashes some genuine ear candy in the chorus, even as the lyrics turn more poignant.

Ben Folds gets a gold star for fitting into three of my five musical genome buckets. Let’s see if anybody else can top that.

So she stands and waits
And waits at the school gate
They’re late, they come, so dumb
In two cars when they agreed one

And it’s gone wrong on her birthday

So they go to Joe’s
For pizza and ice cream
They sit and stare
And Claire just wants to be 9 and a half

Next year she’ll tell them she only wants world peace

But Claire, Claire baby
I wish you knew how this all got twisted
I wish you could see right inside us
In all of this stuff, the best of us that we can’t get out

What’s the point of this?
What’s wrong with two birthdays?
It’s cool, at school
Her friends they all have two birthdays

Aw jeez, he just asked the waitress out on a date on her birthday

But Claire, Claire baby
I wish you knew how this all got twisted
I wish you could see right inside us
In all of this stuff, the best of us that we can’t get out

Here’s the check
They pay with two cards like they’ve never met
Goodbyes
Outside it’s cold in LA

But Claire, Claire baby
I wish you knew how this all got twisted
I wish you could see right inside us

You’re the best of us
The most of us
You’re what we were
You’re all that’s left
It used to be our birthday too

3 thoughts on “Song of the Day #1,500: ‘Claire’s Ninth’ – Ben Folds

  1. Amy says:

    At what point between tearing through 4,000 pages of Games of Throne did you manage to pull off this little project? Do you sleep?!

    Regardless, I find your categories amusing, as I’m sure there are more examples of PURE POP or PIANO MEN (AND WOMEN) that you don’t like than that belong to your list of top 35. There must be some other distinguishing factor (perhaps that key tonality 😉 that connect them, no? Not that I’m suggesting you look for it! Get some sleep man 🙂

  2. Dana says:

    For me, it begins and ends with the major key tonality.😃

    Anyway, we hane discussed offline the virtues and vices of the Pandora music genome project. I will say that, sometimes, it works fairly well…as when Dr. John, of whom I own not a single record, comes on the Randy Newman station. Other times not so much…like when John Prine or almost any country artist pops on the Lyle Lovett station.

    Here’s my profound opinion: sometimes our tastes are predictable and sometimes they aren’t.

    I grew up loving piano based singer songwriters (Joel, John, Newman, Jackson) so loving Folds was a predictable extension. On the other hand, I am generally not a fan of rap, country or heavy metal, yet, somehow, for seemingly inexplicable reasons, I like Eminem, Lovett and have a soft spot for old Van Halen. I would argue that, with most of these exceptions, the talent of the artist or pure nostalgia (in the case of Van Halen) allows me to enjoy them despite, not because of, their genre. Then again, even with Lovett, I have less patience for his more country side and gravitate far more to his jazz and blues. Similarly, Eminem’s hardest of raps tend to lead me to change the track. So, certainly in the case of programming these artists on pandora, I fully recognize and expect not to like the “similar” artists the genome predicts I should like.

    Anyway, I love today’s song and artist and look forward to exploring your personal genome.😊

  3. andrea katz says:

    Those lyrics are so moving. How do you hide tears in a cubicle?

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