If only Shakira were at least somewhat unattractive, or somewhat out of shape… I believe she’d be far better off. Then she wouldn’t be tempted to dress in an outfit that looks like it lost a fight with a pair of scissors and gyrate in a cage like an epileptic.

This woman is a true trailblazer… the only South American artist to ever have a #1 Billboard hit in the U.S. and the first to receive a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. She’s a good friend of fellow Colombian Gabriel Garcia Marquez. She spends her spare time taking history classes at UCLA. She’s a celebrated humanitarian who dedicates plenty of time and money to helping the underprivileged in her home country and the rest of the world.

But she insists on presenting herself artistically as a half-naked contortionist.

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